With A Father’s Heart (Patris Corde)

No article on Christian fatherhood would be complete without looking at the preeminent example of human fatherhood, St Joseph, even if he was not the natural father of Our Lord. 

All four Gospels speak of Jesus as “the son of Joseph.” ^[i] The fact that Joseph named Jesus as instructed by the Angel, (see Mt 1:21) meant he was both legally the father of Jesus, and in relationship terms – in the society of the time – he was truly considered as his father. 

Indeed, it is what St Joseph did and how he did it that provide the most compelling evidence of his fatherhood.   Citing St Paul VI, Pope Francis said St Joseph expressed his fatherhood “by making his life a sacrificial service to the mystery of the incarnation and its redemptive purpose.” ^[ii]

The title of this article also echoes the title of a little book, A Father’s Heart, containing the thoughts of another father. ^[iii]  His name was Jimmy Pierson.  He and his widow Anne are modern day pro-life heroes. 

St Joseph is the holiest of all the Saints after his wife and mother of Our Lord, the Blessed Virgin Mary, and thus the holiest of fathers.  Nevertheless, Jimmy Pierson was an outstanding father to many vulnerable people – pregnant and scared mums, new mums and their babies, foster children, even scared fathers of pregnant mums, and to his own two daughters, one of whom was a child with special-needs.  He was truly a great father. 

We all desire greatness

We all desire greatness.  Seriously, we do!  As we get older, and arguably wiser, our understanding of what greatness is, and what we can achieve, undoubtedly changes.  Nevertheless, the desire is there.  Think of our childhood fantasies; our aspirations and desires as we grow up and dreaming big dreams; our fascination with great achievements in others. 

We know that we are made in God’s image, and so this desire for greatness must be something our Heavenly Father has placed within each of us.  When properly expressed, it is a desire for something truly good.  The challenge is getting a right understanding of what true greatness looks like.

Mark’s Gospel gives insight.

“They came to Capernaum. When He was in the house, He asked them, “What were you arguing about on the road?” But they kept quiet because on the way they had argued about who was the greatest. Sitting down, Jesus called the Twelve and said, “Anyone who wants to be first must be the very last, and the servant of all.”  Mk 9:33-37

They each wanted to be great.  Note that Jesus didn’t tell them they shouldn’t desire this.  Instead, He showed them that true greatness lies in servanthood. 

Going deeper still, Jesus drives the point home by placing a little child among them, and telling them (and us):

“Whoever welcomes one of these little children in my name welcomes me; and whoever welcomes me does not welcome me but the one who sent me.” Mark 9:37

When we welcome the little ones, we welcome Jesus and therefore Our Father in Heaven, for they are One!  And when we serve others, including the little ones, we are most certainly on the right path for greatness.

This welcoming of children starts with the most vulnerable of little children – when babies are in their mother’s wombs.  If a child in utero is your own child, know then that God has chosen you to be that child’s father from the moment of his or her conception.

Even if you are not the biological father, God in His Providence has still chosen you, and will help you to be a true father, with a father’s heart.  After all, God chose St Joseph.

Welcoming little ones is a whole of life thing – welcoming children at all stages, along with the vulnerable and weak, too. 

Fatherhood in action

To illustrate fatherhood in action, I’m going to borrow now from Jimmy Pierson’s insights into a great father’s heart.  I have added in some of Pope Francis’ insights, as well as some of my own thoughts as a father and grandfather. 

• You are called to be Noble

Being a father to children is indeed a noble calling – “a reflection of God’s heart as a Father.”  It calls us to something higher and beyond ourselves; calls us to seek always to be a better man, a better father, a better husband / brother / son.

• You are Chosen

God chooses us!  But we know we are not automatically equipped to be the best father from the get-go, and so we have to learn to become great fathers.  How?  By observing and learning from other great fathers. 

• You are called to be a Comforter, full of Compassion and Loving

“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves received from God.” 2 Cor. 1:3-4

Jimmy Pierson clearly knew this about God, and trusted that he would receive all he needed from God so that he could give in turn.  In his words:

“Comfort is tender love.  When we love with tenderness, our children become secure in our love.”

“I love them one at a time.”  (He was quoting Saint Teresa of Calcutta!) ^[iv]

In St Joseph, Jesus clearly had the authentic human experience of the tender love of God: “As a father has compassion for his children, so the Lord has compassion for those who fear him.” Ps 103:13 ^[v] 

• You are called to be Obedient ^[vi]

Obedience to and fear of God is probably the most vital part of the ‘how’ of great fatherhood!  St Joseph was called to obey in the most challenging of circumstances; marry his pregnant betrothed; flee to Egypt; return to Israel; settle in Galilee.  And he was obedient to the Law of Moses.

In parallel with this call to be obedient to God, we are also called, commanded in fact, to love our own father and mother!

“Honour your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land which the Lord your God gives you.” Ex 20:12

This comes with a promise!  Our parents were chosen for us by God our Father in Heaven.  Honouring them honours God, and prepares us for Heaven – the land which the Lord your God gives.

Pope Francis expresses the value of St Joseph’s example beautifully when he says:

“During the hidden years in Nazareth, Jesus learned at the school of Jospeh to do the will of the Father.  That will was to be his daily food.” ^[vii]

It is worth commenting too that the love children have for their parents is a powerful testament to the quality of the love their parents had for them.  St Joseph was indeed a beloved father beyond compare.

• You are called to be Accepting ^[viii]

St Joseph accepted the Virgin Mary unconditionally, even in the face of potential scandal.  He probably did not understand the bigger picture, but he chose to protect Mary’s good name, her dignity, her life, and the future of the child Jesus. Thus, we can be sure that the marriage of Joseph and Mary was the foundation for the hidden preparation of Jesus in Nazareth.

Jimmy Pierson and his wife Anne accepted many pregnant and alone young women into their home, providing for, loving and caring for them.

Marriage is sacramental and the seedbed for begetting children

By God’s design marriage is the intended seedbed for begetting children, and the foundation for raising children. How a husband loves his wife (and vice versa), and how they serve each other, is the loudest and most profound teacher to children of what true love, servanthood, and faithfulness looks like. 

Marriage is also intended to be a Sacramental bond with God and each other.  Our Lord therefore needs to be at the centre of the marriage.  The love of a husband for his wife, and she for him, reveals God’s love to the children, and to others too to the extent the husband and wife allow.  St Joseph and Our Lady show us this.  So too did Jimmy and Anne Pierson.

Many people in the brokenness of the world around us do not have intact or sacramental marriages.  Our Father in Heaven knows this, and offers His help and love anyway. 

Men, if you have children or have responsibility for the care of children who might not be your own, God has still chosen you to fatherhood.  Trust in Him!

Note:
The title of this article is also that of Pope Francis’ Apostolic Letter on the 150^th Anniversary of the Proclamation of St Joseph as Patron of the Universal Church.

FOOTNOTES:

[i] See Lk 4:22; Jn 6:42; Mt 13:55; Mk 6:3

[ii] Francis, Patris Corde, p9.

[iii] Pierson, A Father’s Heart (New Holland, PA, 2014) 

[iv]Pierson, A Father’s Heart, p8.

[v] Francis, Patris Corde, p11.

[vi] Francis, Patris Corde, p14.

[vii] Francis, Patris Corde, p16.

[viii] Francis, Patris Corde, p17.